2 hours....120 minutes...What a lifesaver it was !!

This blog is written especially for the

Surf Excel Matic #GetSmart Contest

I was driving..returning home after a stressful day at office. But my mind was wandering…

I felt empty…something is missing in life…some vital thing that makes one want to get up in the morning with renewed energy and interest..

What is wrong? Is it me? Is it Rahul? Kids?

No! Definitely not kids. They are the joy of my life!

Then what? Why I feel this restlessness?

Rahul is a model husband. Ours is a love marriage. Except for occasional tiffs, we are one happy couple for the past 10 years. Both of us are passionate about our jobs and we make it a point to make allowances whenever our jobs demand it.

Financially we are very well off.

So..what the hell is bugging me ?!! Am I going crazy? Am I bored? Oh god…what I wouldn’t give to know !..…

Maybe..I need a break from everything..

I should talk to Rahul about this..ask him to take a few days off..so that we can go away somewhere and relax..

Awwwww…..How many days it is since Rahul and I relaxed together..let alone talked about anything ???

Realization hit me HARD !!

Oh god! Oh god!

So..that’s what is bugging me…making me restless !!

We have not even had any precious, much needed ‘couple’ time for..how long..3 years? 4 years?

When did we become mere machines??

I decided to resolve the issue then and there !

Yes! Tonight , I’m going to make time somehow to have some precious time with my dear Rahul !

How? Plan..plan….c’mon buddhu..think something..!

Gotcha!!

Didn’t I see some ad in Indiblogger ..challenging bloggers to get 2 hours leisure time if they use Surf Excel Matic ??????

Yes! Yes! I can put it to test..!

Time : 8.30 pm

After homework and dinner, Kids were safely tucked in their room..playing Angry birds.

I put clothes in the washing machine with Surf Excel Matic. Ahhh..I can have my 2 hours now with my dearest Rahul !

"Hope this Surf Excel Matic works it’s magic as it’s promised"...I muttered to myself….

Time: 10.30pm

I felt like flying !

To my greatest surprise, I came to know that Rahul was also in the same grumpy mood, felt the same restlessness without knowing the reason !

That magical 2 hours gave us back our own magic we have for each other..but forgot to tap it amidst our busy schedule !

It’s like falling in love again all the way…all those thrills…loving glances, shared laughter, shared meals, shared dreams, hand holding,…

I felt like shouting from the roof top “we have found our magic “LOVE” again!!

Thank you Surf ExcelMatic ! It’s because of you, I got those precious, life saving 2 hours!

Surf Excel Matic..You kept your promise! Now I know Surf Excel loves clothes as much as I love my Rahul ! :) :)

Killer Stilettos OR Wild Boots -- Who Makes A Better Employee or Entrepreneur?

An old news caught my attention and here I am!

The news - "The proposed ban on stilettos in workplaces"

Continuous wearing of such impossibly high pointed heels definitely lead to many health hazards..
like severe back pain.

At the same time, wearing platforms to add few inches is a must for women who are short to boost up their spirits.

It's just a simple case of choosing the right shoes!

But..as usual..Women consider this as a threat against their freedom and equality!!

This triggered a question " who makes a better employee..women or men?"

Qualification: Different jobs demand different qualifications. Girls excel more in academics than boys.
In higher studies, men are the sure toppers!

But..academic excellence is just a token to get a job. Real qualification is in application and execution. In more elaborate terms..dedication, innovation, development, broader perspective and definitely professionalism.

Dedication: Women are generally more dedicated. Because of their natural affinity with time-consciousness, tackling deadlines comes easier to them than men. Women are the BEST in observing regularity, work ethics, sincerity.

Innovation: Though women excel in academics, Men excel in innovative thinking and ideas. Some jobs demand and mostly rely on such innovative ideas..like Architecture, Film making and such..

Innovation needs adventurous and quirky thinking. Those qualities are second nature to men where as women fall short.

All Women have this single mindedness that sometimes borders on narrow mindedness too. When it comes to Indian women, they lack broader perspective. I blame our society and culture for this character formation. From the cradle, girl children are taught to act submissive. Cultural pressures plant inhibitions in their minds. Societal pressures fuel this inhibitions which leads to narrow mindedness. Indian women are never taught or trained to have their own ideas or to make their own decisions. Some might say that today's women have every freedom possible. But..no..the sad truth is..inspite of their education and economic independence, Indian women are still less individualistic and more submissive.

That's why they excel in clerical jobs and do fairly good in mid level jobs. They find traveling in a well-paved path easier than testing the depth of the unknown!

They lack courage to venture into new opportunities. They lack leadership qualities. How many Lady entrepreneurs we have? Does the ratio of women population balance with the entrepreneurial one?

Indra Nooyi, ICICI chief and Biocon VP are exceptions!

They expect support from others or some outside source [be it government or other] to test waters of the unknown! For example, Govt. formed women self-help groups and women in this group excel beyond expected levels.

Professionalism: Indian women definitely lack professionalism. There are 2 kinds of professionalism. By hook or crook, getting things done is one kind. Another is sticking to one's own ideologies and never compromise. Men have both these qualities. Women certainly don't!

On a personal level, Women get things done in their own way by hook or crook. They don't have many ideologies..even if they do, they don't stick to it to the end. they are ready to compromise.

On a professional level, They like to follow someone and hesitate to lead. They bring in their emotional disturbances to their workplace. They let their Personal woes color or affect their work. They expect favoritism just cz they r women! They hold grudges for a longer period. Professionalism is an alien word to them. Favoritism, petty jealousies, gossip, using feminine wiles, obstinacy , tears are some of their irritating qualities!

Men are far far better than women when it comes to dress code! Sensible attire is what is needed in the workplace. Most offices are forced to put a dress code just cz of Women and their distracting, revealing clothes!

In short, women make better employees, provided the job demands nothing innovative. They are good in clerical and mid level jobs.

Men make 'the best' employees..their unconventional, unruly ways and their arrogance, their sense of humor..everything turn them into a very good entrepreneurs.

Of course..regarding women, exceptions are there. But still, Men excel in being an Entrepreneur!

Compromise

Compromise .....Compromise.....Compromise...!!!

I detest this word! But in reality, Compromises can make or break life !

What do 'you' want? never mind.. just a slight compromise and it'll do u a world of good !

What do 'you' like ? never mind.. compromise, smile and tolerate even if u don't like! You'll become a favorite person to all!

What do 'you' think? never mind... give ears to others' thoughts.. Life will be easier!

Life is full of such compromises! Some compromises make us feel like another Buddha. Some make us feel rotten.. Some make us feel frustrated. But in all this, one loses one's own identity!

Mind and body slowly get numb. We no longer act assertive in establishing our own likes and wants. Is this what they cleverly call "older wiser"? aghh...

In compromising there is no scale in assessing the depth! Everyone to their own ! After a lot of compromises in the name of life, love, like, respect and what not, I really don't know who I'm anymore ! When I look back, i see a sunny gal with innocence as pure as snow, lots of trust, faith, with a world-is-my-oyster kind of confidence! The tastes, likings, wants.. they are still the same. But the person is irrevocably changed! Innocence is forever lost. Trust, faith and the go-getter attitude.. everything is still there... but heavily tinged with cynicism!!

"Cynic" is the apt way to describe Compromises. Be it small or big ones, compromises turn a person into a hardened cynic ! Fact of life ! What do I get in return? Loving family, excellent career..I'm sure. All my compromises make me an apple in the eye of my family and friends ! awww...

so why crying hues???

Because sometimes, even loving family and excellent career couldn't ward off the longing for the lost things, the acute loneliness and Identity crisis ! Chronic Identity Crisis'itis'!

Where is "ME"?
where have i left my true self in my race towards achieving the above two that is loving family and excellent career?

I dont know... i'm perplexed.... I feel lost.....

My first night....My first kiss...!!

I got very good scores in +2 . I was over the moon, when i got admission in a professional college.

I don't know about arts colleges, but professional colleges were hell bent on

Ragging at that time and no strict rules to control the student.

I had enough boost-your-morale speeches from my dad to face it.

Here i have to describe the girl i was at that time...

I was a well-cosseted, spoiled brat. The pampered life made me arrogant.

taking things for granted and my father's high-powered job
only helped in feeding my self absorbance I was not used to people ordering me around. It's always the other way round ! lol

I was wilful, very very impulsive, outspoken I was 17 going on 12 ! oh yes
I was one very innocent, naive girl at that time.

The first day at college went on smoothly. My dad accompanied me and was

treated with utmost respect by the Principal. I was enjoying the reflected glory
without any fear for the coming days..

How stupid !

I realised my stupidity on the 3rd day..

At noon break i visited the canteen where any sane freshers wouldn't dream of visiting ! It was full of seniors, chatting loudly. I made a bee line for the
counter to place my orders..

One senior girl intercepted me, propelled me towards the table where the

other seniors were sitting..

Hey you r new, right? one of them asked

I dragged a chair from nearby table, sat down and beamed at them all..

[ I thought they were being friendly !!]

The entire canteen went silent. The sheer audacity of my actions !

But the dumb me didn't realise my mistake even then..

One senior girl gave me a thorough once over, quirked her brow..

" did we ask you to sit?"

I bristled at the very tone she adopted..

How dare !

"Do i need your permission?" i asked

That attracted the attention of all the seniors in the canteen.

They all surrounded the table. The senior girl went on with her quizzing

Another girl came to stand behind me, both her hands were on my shoulders pressing me down...

Ohh this must be 'the' ragging.. I realised at last!

"So where you from?" she barked

I answered in a bright voice..

"You should greet us all with 'good morning' everyday. You should not sit unless we invite you to do so and you should bring us lunch from your home everyday understand? ! she rattled on the rules in a brisk manner..

For you all? i asked in a shocked tone

"Yes ! and remember this.. Never make the mistake of questioning us.. got it?"

"Yes' i said slowly, seething inside..

Say "yes Mam" ! She barked again

God what a rude awakening it was for me!

So who was with u the other day, that tall guy? another senior asked

My daddy

u still call him 'daddy'?

'Yes' i said

They all laughed and i got confused

I started prattling about my dad

The senior stopped me with a quelling look...

"So your daddy seems like a very good catch! mmmm.. ask him to come

tomorrow. I'd like to go on a date with him!" She ordered me imperiously

I was totally confused and kind of shocked by this.

I forgot my fear and laughed at her saying "hey my daddy is old and he

is married too"

I was one prize idiot at that time, I realize that now! :)

The problem was, i was well aware of the fact that they were making

fun of me but 'of what' I didn't understand.

Ok let's forget your old daddy then. Of all the seniors here, Whom u like

the most? she asked

A tricky question indeed I figured out the trap but blundered in a colossal

way with my dumb answer !

In girls, I like you all! I beamed again

"Ohhhhh " there was a big chorus

In boys?

I carefully started assessing every senior boy ignoring the laughter.

The boys were doing all kind of faces at me. I smiled back at them but

still carefully assessing!

They were 20-25 boys and one caught my attention [maybe he fulfilled my [subconscious requirements!] Till date i don't know why i was so reluctant to say
the same answer " i like all boys too"
I pointed at him as my favorite.

Now the entire canteen rocked with wolf whistles and laughter..

What's so special with him? one senior boy asked

"He is tall, and he is not laughing at me like you all do" I mumbled [ dont ask me how being tall and not laughing at me are related! :):)]

Oh, this girl is such a baby yaar ! one senior shaked her head in amazement

what will you do when u get married? one senior asked

Imagine yourself having a first night with your husband what will u do? she asked

Now my 'fav' senior boy voiced his objection, asked them to let me go.

But the rest were having too much fun at my expense to heed his request!

I tried to recall whatever I'd seen in the movies..

I always had this idea that first nights happen only in movies, kinda 'fantasy like'!

So i said the usual things the decorated room, going in with milk,

the fine clothes,

'Go on, Wont u touch your husband's feet asking his blessings? senior prodded me

"I wont !" I shaked my head briskly

well ok.. what then?

"we'll both go to sleep"!

What about kiss ? one senior boy asked

I blushed furiously [talk about being shy !] but my arrogance and pride

wdn't let me admit defeat

'I dont know how to kiss'.. I mumbled on the verge of tears but holding on

desperately..

Oh c'mon a know-all like u dont know about kissing? senior girl mocked

I glared at her defiantly with a false bravado refused to answer..

She smiled at me placatingly and assured me " dont worry B we'll teach u how to kis. Our seniors taught us how to. So it's all part of ragging, u know" !

dumber me believed her line !

Here comes the so called 'Kiss'..

She made a fist and sucked on the upperside just under the

thumb and forefinger !

Do it like that ! she ordered me!

Though i was intrigued i was reluctant to do it.

It seemed distasteful !

No wonder they say growing up is painful!

They all left with a warning that i shouldnt come to the college

without practicing my kissing skill !

At home, My mom noticed me sucking my fist.

She was appalled when i explained things.

So i went to my dad asking whether i got it doing in the right way!

well in my book, dad was my hero and he sure had answers to every

question and every problem.

Though my dad did avoid answering me directly, he didn't laugh at me either!

He sat and talked with me for a while appreciated me for the way i faced

my ragging without waterworks and in a professional courses,how
seniors can be helpful.

Out of fear of losing face, i went through the practice with such dedication,

that my fist looked red in the morning ! lolz

The next day i went to see that senior girl.

But she laughed off the entire episode never asked me to show

my skill [what a waste ! hehehe]

And that senior boy i picked out of the whole lot became my best friend.

Mine was much nicer. Some of the other freshers went thru the ordeal of

stripping and all

One interesting detail

When i was in London One lady told me that old ladies teach their grand kids

especially young girls to say the following words repeatedly "potato", "pout", "pound"

Why, do u think?

Any wild guesses?

well ..when saying these words the lips form a perfect pout which looks oh-so-attractive and oh-so-kissable !

Why our grandmothers never teach us such important life-saving tricks like this...i wonder...!! :):)